Why are we, as a society, so damn obsessed with punishment and retribution?
I work with children, and while I have worked in the youth justice system, I’m focusing here on everyday minor infractions.
We carry this false belief that a person has to learn what they did was wrong, so they must be punished in a manner commensurate with their misdeeds.
There’s a significant flaw in our logic here.
“Kids with challenging behaviours lack skill, not will.”—Dr. Stuart Ablon
“When we view behaviours as intentional, we tend to use disciplinary strategies aimed at a surface target rather than the underlying cause of the behaviour.”—Dr. Mona Delahooke
“Punishment teaches children how to avoid punishment; it does not teach children anything about the nature of appropriate relationships.”—Josette Luvmour
“Too often, caregivers, teachers, providers, and parents assume that a child is acting deliberately, when in fact a behaviour is actually a stress response.”—Dr. Mona Delahooke
“Our traditional discipline policies and protocols have been reactive and reflexive, focusing primarily on consequences.” — Dr. Lori Desautels
Read my article in Neurodiversified.
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